Yada, yada, yada. Spoiler warning! Blah, blah, blah.
I’m getting tired of True Blood. Honestly. Truly. Tired of the writers doing jack shit to fix the mess they’ve created with all of their ridiculous TV tropes. This show has jumped the shark so many times, the shark has had time to count the pubes on True Blood’s snatch–two thousand, cut into a very neat little V.
So we finally, after a season and a half of agonizing of this stupid fucking character, have a face for Warlow. Whoop-dee-fucking-do. I was tired of this story line last year, when they failed to grab my interest over this mysterious vampire who’d killed Sookie and Jason’s parents. They tried to make Warlow interesting by giving him a handsome face to hide behind. It almost worked. Almost. Hey, I’m not immune to sexy people. I did state at the beginning of the season that Alexander Skarsgard’s gorgeous bod was the only reason I’d stick around for a while.
Now I watch the show out of spite. With a lot of rum to accompany me. (I’m currently looking for alcohol sponsors to “fund” these reviews. It isn’t cheap keeping just drunk enough to not care about the awful writing.)
Sookie proves to have half a brain in her head during this episode. I know, I’m as shocked as you are. No one came running to her aid, or told her flat-out what was going on with this random fae guy she’d found. As a matter of fact, aside from family, every single person who she’d normally rely on are elsewhere. I don’t know if that was semi-intelligent writing or a horrific mistake. Sookie’s stories have always been about her saving herself, but also saving the people she loves. They’ve cut her off from everyone. She doesn’t go in to work. Sookie and Sam haven’t spoken since the end of last season. She’s had little to no screen time with her vampires, either. I don’t blame her about not being kind to Bill when they spoke in last week’s episode. In my world, Billith doesn’t exist either.
They short changed Andy in this episode. We didn’t really get to see the full impact of his fatherhood and the trouble his quadruplets have wandered into. Though, we did get some nice emotional stuff from his brother, Terry. However, I see Terry falling into a rut easily. He’s a character notorious for not being able to cope with his past thanks to PTSD. The writers use it as a crutch any time they realize they haven’t paid enough attention to Terry and Arlene. While it is nice for them to address a serious condition, it is also very easy for them to use it as a rather annoying and cliché soapbox.
Bloody Eric. He’s brilliant and a moron all at the same time. Despite being older than dirt, he still holds out hope for humanity. It’ll come back to bite him in the dick. Hell, it already has in ways I won’t say because then I’d just be telling you the entire damn episode instead of forcing you to endure this shit with me for the few gleaming moments of good story telling and acting.
One final note – Can Jessica be any hotter this season? I swear to all that is unholy, she’s quickly taking over as my new favorite eye candy on the show. Last season (and a few before) it was Alcide and Eric. Well, Eric is still in the running. However Alcide and the shittastic story line they’ve give the wolves has dampened my wolfy lust. It is a sad, sad day when I’m not excited to see Joe Manganiello on my screen, guys. I’m going to finish my drink in memory of all the sexy dreams I had about that wolf.